16 December 2009

Slump

No, nothing will ever happen with Laila again.

Stupid self-confidence. I told myself it would be fine, however things played out. The fact is, I'm depressed at the thought that she may very well have been the one, and I lost her because of my immaturity and desire to have more than I could actually manage.

OK, so maybe I do elevate her on a pedestal, but I find her to be a truely singular being. Maybe it's right that one should never seek to revisit the past.

I doubt Miss Right will just walk into my life, but I don't believe I really deserve happiness. Not if all I ever do is destroy it so utterly, so perfectly, because I'm just a little boy in a big man's suit.

So, the Rod Stewart Method it is, then.

Fuck.

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